Sunday, December 14, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
Do you ever wonder why...
People become total assholes during the holidays? Isn't the whole purpose of Christmas to bring cheer and happiness?
I swear people get this holiday bug up their ass and it ruins the whole season.
The grocery store is like a fucking rat race. I thought this hefty woman was going to take me out for the last can of libby's pumpkin and this old guy literally ran my foot over with his cart. Hi asshole, that is connected to the rest of my body and it hurts.
I had no real point, other than people are usually jerks, but it seems to be more intense during the holidays..that's all.
I swear people get this holiday bug up their ass and it ruins the whole season.
The grocery store is like a fucking rat race. I thought this hefty woman was going to take me out for the last can of libby's pumpkin and this old guy literally ran my foot over with his cart. Hi asshole, that is connected to the rest of my body and it hurts.
I had no real point, other than people are usually jerks, but it seems to be more intense during the holidays..that's all.
Monday, December 1, 2008
excuse me...are you pickling that???
Happy Thanksgiving!!
I had a somewhat relaxing weekend. My in-laws came into town, we got to see a movie (Role Models) and do a little shopping. For those of you with children you know that it's as good as it gets.
Thanksgiving dinner was...interesting. Good, but not what I had in mind when I woke up that morning. My in-laws brought a "smoked" turkey, which they had laying around in their freezer that they didn't want to go to waste. Which is fine, that they had it sitting in their freezer(?), but not so fine that it was smoked. I actually hate smoked meats, I think it makes it taste weird and gives it a rubber like texture. I am more of a simple girl who likes good old fashion turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy and the canned cranberry sauce. That's it, nothing fancy.
The real holiday fun started with the pork loin dinner the night before. For those of you who know me, you should be aware that I hate pork. ESPECIALLY in a chop form. The visual of it alone makes me want to puke. My husband's family has this tradition that they do every xmas, which disgusts me beyond belief, but hey, it's tradition.(yay)
His parents buy about a gallon of vinegar and a large pork roast, they then chop up the roast leaving all of the fat intact (I can taste the puke in the back of my throat) and soaking it in vinegar at room temperature for 2 days. I believe it is called "pickling." They then cook the pickled fatty pork in a large pan with a few inches of grease. (Joy I understand if you need to stop reading this) The grease then splats all over EVERYTHING frying the large, fatty, pickled pieces of pork. It is literally enough to make me remodel my kitchen to rid the smell when it's all done. They all love it (his family that is) and eat it for days every xmas. Not only does the smell linger, the amount of leftovers seems never ending. If I didn't hate pork before, seeing this would have been enough to make me hate it. It's nothing personal, but when I have to ask "umm excuse me, are you really pickling that pork?" I mean come ON!! Pickled pork? Who does that sound tasty to? Or "doesn't meat need to be refridgerated?" So back to my story, last year they made this "dish" at my house while the whole clan was in town. I made it a SERIOUS point that I do NOT eat pork, so this year it wouldn't even be in my vocabulary. Not to mention his parents bought the entire stock of pork from safeway and continued to make pork chops 2 nights in a row, in addition to this pickled business.
I will give you ONE guess what was on the menu the first night they arrived. Pork Loin!! DING DING, you win. I was like WTF, you have got to be kidding me???
My mother in-law served my plate up and watched me shift around the pork and yams (another thing I dislike) till they left the table then I rushed to dump it in the trash. Once they retired to bed, my husband and I hit up del taco, I was one hungry bitch. I kindly asked my husband to remind my in-laws that I loathe pork. So he did. As all loving in-laws do, I was offered bacon the next morning at breakfast. After I kindly turned down their offer I was then hit with a below the belt comment of "oh that's right, you don't eat pork now." Umm correction. I have NEVER ate pork. This isn't a trend, or a phase I am going through. I can guarantee you that I will not change my mind on this one. ESPECIALLY after seeing the pickled action the previous year. I couldn't believe I was offered bacon the very next day. It was like a really bad episode of Punked, except I am not famous and Ashton didn't pop out of my hall closet. Were they handing out pork that day or what? That is when i realized I need to learn to love the smell of pork sitting in vinegar. I have a feeling it will haunt me every xmas for the rest of my life. ho ho ho
I had a somewhat relaxing weekend. My in-laws came into town, we got to see a movie (Role Models) and do a little shopping. For those of you with children you know that it's as good as it gets.
Thanksgiving dinner was...interesting. Good, but not what I had in mind when I woke up that morning. My in-laws brought a "smoked" turkey, which they had laying around in their freezer that they didn't want to go to waste. Which is fine, that they had it sitting in their freezer(?), but not so fine that it was smoked. I actually hate smoked meats, I think it makes it taste weird and gives it a rubber like texture. I am more of a simple girl who likes good old fashion turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy and the canned cranberry sauce. That's it, nothing fancy.
The real holiday fun started with the pork loin dinner the night before. For those of you who know me, you should be aware that I hate pork. ESPECIALLY in a chop form. The visual of it alone makes me want to puke. My husband's family has this tradition that they do every xmas, which disgusts me beyond belief, but hey, it's tradition.(yay)
His parents buy about a gallon of vinegar and a large pork roast, they then chop up the roast leaving all of the fat intact (I can taste the puke in the back of my throat) and soaking it in vinegar at room temperature for 2 days. I believe it is called "pickling." They then cook the pickled fatty pork in a large pan with a few inches of grease. (Joy I understand if you need to stop reading this) The grease then splats all over EVERYTHING frying the large, fatty, pickled pieces of pork. It is literally enough to make me remodel my kitchen to rid the smell when it's all done. They all love it (his family that is) and eat it for days every xmas. Not only does the smell linger, the amount of leftovers seems never ending. If I didn't hate pork before, seeing this would have been enough to make me hate it. It's nothing personal, but when I have to ask "umm excuse me, are you really pickling that pork?" I mean come ON!! Pickled pork? Who does that sound tasty to? Or "doesn't meat need to be refridgerated?" So back to my story, last year they made this "dish" at my house while the whole clan was in town. I made it a SERIOUS point that I do NOT eat pork, so this year it wouldn't even be in my vocabulary. Not to mention his parents bought the entire stock of pork from safeway and continued to make pork chops 2 nights in a row, in addition to this pickled business.
I will give you ONE guess what was on the menu the first night they arrived. Pork Loin!! DING DING, you win. I was like WTF, you have got to be kidding me???
My mother in-law served my plate up and watched me shift around the pork and yams (another thing I dislike) till they left the table then I rushed to dump it in the trash. Once they retired to bed, my husband and I hit up del taco, I was one hungry bitch. I kindly asked my husband to remind my in-laws that I loathe pork. So he did. As all loving in-laws do, I was offered bacon the next morning at breakfast. After I kindly turned down their offer I was then hit with a below the belt comment of "oh that's right, you don't eat pork now." Umm correction. I have NEVER ate pork. This isn't a trend, or a phase I am going through. I can guarantee you that I will not change my mind on this one. ESPECIALLY after seeing the pickled action the previous year. I couldn't believe I was offered bacon the very next day. It was like a really bad episode of Punked, except I am not famous and Ashton didn't pop out of my hall closet. Were they handing out pork that day or what? That is when i realized I need to learn to love the smell of pork sitting in vinegar. I have a feeling it will haunt me every xmas for the rest of my life. ho ho ho
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