Without getting into too much detail I had a confrontation with my work "friend" this week. I didn't realize I was having one till the word "shady" came shooting out of her mouth directed at me. I was like what? Bitch, yes. Bold, yes. Critical, sometimes. Shady? umm I think not.
It is amazing to me how people can just flip on the drop of a dime. You spend months working and spending time with someone and you think, we are friends, they have my back. At least you would assume that is how adults would act. ( I use the term adults, loosely..)
It all goes back to me moving into a position that originally 1 person did that was broken into 2 positions. I took one half and that person took another. I guess our boss made promises to that person that I was unaware of and apparently that he did not keep. (I have to wonder if he even recalls making the promise)
Fast forward to Monday where it is confirmed I am set to travel as part of MY position to Canada with another co-worker. The individual mentioned above did not take kindly to that information and felt somehow wronged by the situation and by the fact she was not included in the trip. She grew angry and hurt. I felt bad and wished I understood why our boss would leave her out. She had worked here for 2 years and really worked hard to prove herself, how could she be overlooked. I examined the situation more closely:
- She no longer handles the area in which this trip is focusing on
- I do the day-to-day grunt work and communications with the people who require support
- There is really no work related reason for her to take this trip
- Why does she even care? She wanted NOTHING to do with this group till this trip came up
Tuesday rolls around, I get the cold shoulder.
Wednesday rolls around I get approached in my cubicle and told "I thought you were my friend" "you are shady" "you kept the trip from me, I am disappointed in you." and so on.
I am sure you are asking yourself, why this person would be so angry at me?
Trust me, I asked myself the same question several times while I was being yelled at like a 8 year old who stole a $5 bill from their mommy's wallet. Sadly, I came up empty.
I simply replied that I had no idea she was even supposed to go and that the trip and how she even figures I kept it from here when it hadn't even been booked till that day was beyond me. She acknowledged I didn't know she was supposed to go then told me I was lying and that the trip had been discussed weeks ago. Which is true, however, it also got cancelled or moved 4 times. I didn't think it was an issue or a big secret, so how I was being "shady" was still confusing to me.
Somehow, in some way, this person still felt very strongly that I had somehow wronged them and was "shady." I was speechless, and for those of you who know me, I am rarely speechless. I have a witty come back for just about everything. Sitting on the verge of a complete meltdown--it took every ounce of me to hold myself back from saying "GET OVER IT!!!!" Life isn't fair, deal with it! You do not work in this area anymore, I do all the shit work day in and day out and I was asked to go. Just because there is one semi perk involved does not mean you can just jump on the train. NEWSFLASH*** being at a company "longer" does not make you better or more suitable to handle a job. This isn't a contest, and learn to deal with your shit in more mature constructive ways instead of picking fights with the small fish because you don't have the balls to bring it up with the big fish. I don't even get the rational. It is beyond my realm of thinking to even understand why she could be so angry at ME, or angry at all.
I went from being bummed to overly pissed that this person even felt as much entitled to talk to me this way in front of my colleagues and to attack my personal character when clearly she is the one who is acting shady to not even caring. The problem is, everything I wanted to say, would have gone in one ear and out another. The more I ran it through my head while she was wiping the floor with my ass, it would have been pointless. Historically, this person has been very abusive toward me for a long time. Always making it a point how much better she is at her job than me and how she deserves to be promoted and rewarded over me. I always let it go (which is not my personality at all) and chalked it up to "it's just the way she is" but not anymore. I am done and over it. I graduated high school in '99 and have no intention of going back. (yes Prince's 1999 song was our theme song) I was so rubbed the wrong way by the whole thing and how someone who is so bright in the work they do could act so childish in their personal life, and even worse not to see how irrational they are being.
Thursday, we pass in the halls and avoid each other. Oh the fun...what will Friday bring?
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